Friday, August 23, 2013
Things I Suck At
I got to thinking about how God sees me, what HE thinks about me VS what I think about me. There are about 67 pieces of scripture in the bible that talk about God's love for us, and what we can do through Him. I sat back though, and thought about all of the things I SUCK at that I KNOW without a shadow of a doubt, that if I'm successful at any one of them its because of God.
1.) I can't draw for beans. somehow I manage to screw up a stick figure. How?! i have no idea.... It's a soft spot, so I don't want to discuss it further.
2.) I know this sounds terrible, but I could NOT raise another baby. People ask for for parenting advice sometimes (i say just beat them...ok I'm lying) and there are times I volunteer what I did with my boy without anyone asking. But could I actually NATURALLY deal with the terrible twos, threes, and so on? probably not. Not without being heavily medicated.
3.) I suck at Candy crush. This has nothing to do with anything except me sucking.
4.) I suck at keeping things short and sweet, and to the point. I'm pretty sure it's a female thing, and I'm even more sure God is a man, so it makes sense that when I pray for Him to only allow me to say what he wants me to say, It's usually pretty direct, and short.
5.) I suck at being "organized"... or what the world sees as being organized. I know where everything is, even when its everywhere.
6.) I don't know how to whistle. don't laugh at me... i have tried for 28 years to whistle (yes I came out of the womb attempting this)
Through all of the things I suck at, God uses them all. Minus the candy crush thing... 'less He uses it to build my patience.
We all have weaknesses, we all have gifts. But the pretty flippin sweet thing is that God uses our weaknesses, and our suckiness to bring Glory to Him.
What are things you suck at, that when God works through them, its obvious that it's ALL Him?
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One thing i suck at is forgiveness.. i have been able to forgive things that nobody should ever have to experience and i believe i have simply because it has allowed me to become the strong woman i am today.. but then there are a few things.. one that i really struggle with that i want to believe i have forgiven but am not able to say it outloud... or tell that said person. What is the true definition of forgiveness? Have i truely forgiven even if i get sick to my stomach at the thought of lookin up his facebook to message my forgiveness.. or am i just wanting to think i have just to believe i am that much closer to god? I really struggle with this because i feel like its keeping me from being as close to god as i want. another thing i struggle with is envy. don't get me wrong i am grateful for everything i have. my kids, my hardworkin husband. i am not ashamed of not havin a new car or licin in an appt. my husband and i have just began our forever together so those are things we will accomplish in time.. truthfully i envy those who can perfect the cutest hairstyle qhen i cannot and never could get my hair to style right. very frustrating.. or for instance your wardrobe is so pretty.. i however cannot seem to shop for myself. i settle for things that are ok rather then spendin the few extra bucks for something that couldve looked great. Or i tell myself just because it looked good on her does not mean it will on me.. my husband makes it a point everyday to tell me how beautiful i am.. but i struggle with being able to tell myself i am.. maybe i just need a makeover i don't know but you have akways had a way with words. i am hoping through you i can have a better understanding of gods definition of forgiveness and the difference between doing what he wants and just sliding by. any help would be appreciated.
ReplyDeleteHey Tiffany! Thanks for reading my blog! First, let me say that What i wrote here are not so serious things i'm awful at. And to be completely transparent, i struggle and have struggled with those same things that you have mentioned. Lets take a look real quick at what "love" is. If you have an NIV go back to the dictionary in the back of it and take a look at what the biblical definition of love is. To save a few minutes of your time, it is the mercy, grace and purity that God displayed for us when He sent His son to die for our sins. With that being said, these things are intertwined in forgiveness. The biblical definition if grace is giving something that is not earned, or undeserving. So, if i punch you in the face right now, it kinda goes without being said that I haven't earned anything except a punch back, right? Grace is blessing, forgiving, etc. when it's undeserved. I can't tell ya how many times a day, for MANY days/month/years i had to repeat in my head "mercy, grace,purity" to keep myself from acting like a crazy person when someone went above and beyond to be nasty etc. The awesome news is that DAILY God forgives us. Christ is in us, and Christ is love. I remember i use to write those words on my order pad at a rest. I worked at so that when hateful customers came in, I could look at it, and genuinely smile at them. The more serious the "crime" the more justified we feel when we hold those feelings of unforgiveness. But is it changing them? Or is it changing you? Probably you, for the worst. They're unaffected. God will correct them, if/when they know Him. I've seen people do horrendous things to me, then God corrects them years later, and they find me to apologize. I accept thier apology continue to pray for them, and move on. Now, good ol eeeeenvy. Let this sink deep into your guts, pray about what I'm fixin to say, and come to your own conclusion; it's something I'm sure you've heard me say in the past. Don't compare your behind the scenes mess with someone else's well put together highlight reel. My pastor said that a couple years ago, and it was like my whole stinkin world was changed! I shop at goodwill by the way, lol so its not an extra buck or two. It'what you are comfortable with. Seriously like two days ago, i was on facebook looking at some friend's pictures, and thought "maaaaaaaan, i wish i was stylish like that.... My butt would be WAY to big for that shirt" and yes I said shirt cause it covered her butt. There's one connection every woman has, and that's that even when we won't admit it out loud, we struggle with envying the girl next to us. Be OK with your style, your hair, your makeup. 'Cause it's YOU. Something my hubby taught me was to be ok with who I am. Flaws and all. God will work on what He sees fit. Pray for wisdom, and understanding. Pray to see things and people how God does. And understand that regardless of your clothes, the honor, mercy, grace, purity, and uplifting others, makes you more beautiful than anything that revlon can put on the market. Long winded i know. Bear with me ;) and be blessed sister!
DeleteVery well said. and tremendous help. thanks! :) so my understanding goes that even if what they did should seem unforgiving to gracefully forgive because god will not necessarily punish them but help them to understand what they did was harsh and help them to grow into a better person..i used to be a strong believer in karma so i guess knowing that i needed to pray to HELP them instead of hurt them back just seemed crazy to me... I've forgiven some pretty crazy things but this to me was so unexceptable because of who he was and what he did. trusting family was always a must until then... and it played a big role in my anxiety, depression and even past addictions.. i am proud to say i rose above all that because i disnt want to be numb forever.. i didn't want him to affect who i was becoming or the example i was settin for my kiddos.. so in a way i felt i had forgiven him i just wanted to be able to say it outloud. I'm gettin closer to that now. thanks for the help!
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