Keeping up with the Janes

(Philippians 4:11; Not that I speak in respect to lack, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content in it.) I met a lady once that always seemed to have it all together; being around her brought a tidal wave of emotions that I had never experienced all at once- astonishment, admiration, and irritation with a dash of intimidation. She was on the PTA, worked a solid job, her house was always spotless and so were her kids.. yes, more than one. She was giving, loving, kind, soft spoken, self disciplined, obedient to her husband... The laundry list goes on and on. Being around her was like I had stepped into a home off of the Stepford Wives. After some time of being around "Jane", I realized I was a lot more like her than I had thought... Or well... She was a lot more like me. I discovered that though this poster mom had it all together from the outside, there were things going on inside of her that no one could see. She struggled with her self image, she was lonely because her husband spent more time in other places than he did at home, she felt unappreciated as he walked by the well behaved kids, and spotless house and never gave her a thank you. She felt spiritually drained because church and God just kind of turned into a routine, a knee jerk. But she plastered on a smile and pushed through. I learned that some days she struggled to get out of bed, and that like me she daily fought an eating disorder. I'm a people watcher and learner. I talk more than most, but somehow I'm able to pay attention and soak up what's around me simultaneously. I've watch people for years compare their life to someone else's. Compare their body to another's. I've watch grown adults spend time saturating themselves in their jobs to have what the next guy has. Thinking "If I could get what they have, my world will look like theirs does". OK, maybe not that exactly, but you get the point... We trade these things for our marriages, we trade them for our children, we trade them for our integrity and dignity. And we wonder what's wrong with us, and our lives. We never stop to think that "Jane" - though very well put together on her highlight reel- has a terrible mess behind the scenes. And so the cycle continues. I'm learning that we all have flaws. Every person that you meet has something going on inside of them.... An internal battle of good and evil. And if I really stop and think about it, when we compare the outside view of someone's life to our own, we're comparing it to something that is sometimes superficial. We're comparing one person's mask to our own. Even to go so far as to say "Well, my mess isn't as bad as hers" or "Well, I'm definitely having a better day than THAT guy" is just as destructive. People say all the time that they prefer the TRUTH. And then you tell them the truth when it's asked of you, and they don't want to hear it. They want a quick fix. They want a solution to fall into their laps. They don't want to hear that they need to work on THEM and stop wanting what "Jane" has, because Jane has a mess too. And Jane is looking at you wanting what you have. There are a TON of things we're NOT, but there are even more things that we ARE. Letting go of comparison, and learning to LOVE who we are, APPRECIATING what we have and learning to accept God's correction are ingredients for contentment. What a load off of our shoulders it would be if we weren't always trying to keep up with the "Janes".